On Fri, 21 Apr 2017 11:59:51 -0400, Tony Cooper
Post by Tony Cooper
On Fri, 21 Apr 2017 07:00:56 -0700 (PDT), Lothar Frings
Post by Lothar Frings Post by James Wilkinson Sword Post by Lothar Frings Post by GordonD Post by James Wilkinson Sword
"Mr Smith, Mr Jones. Mr Jones, Mr Smith."
You only need to say each name ONCE.
Because if you only say the name once, Mr Jones will feel slighted
because he feels that Mr Smith has been told who he is, but *he* hasn't
been told who Mr Smith is and this makes him feel inferior.
Even the most stupid Mr. Jones will conclude
from the fact that I address the other one
as "Mr. Smith" that he is Mr. Smith.
I just point to each person and say their name. Clearly when I say each one, I'm introducing him to every other person present.
That's how I do it, too. But I'm German;
Americans, for example, are a little
more prickly[*] in some respects.
[*] Is that a proper word for "easily offended"?
GordonD, the prickly person above, is a Scot...not that I have noticed
any prickliness on his part.
And, yes, a person who is prickly is one who is easily offended or
On the subject of introductions, Americans are casual about who is
introduced first in general social situations. In social situations
there's no concept of rank, but a husband aware of social conventions
might present a person to his wife rather than his wife to the other
In formal business situations, status is considered but not always
observed in introductions. Most Americans are not schooled in social
conventions of this nature and wouldn't have a concept of who should
be introduced first.
All around the world, a smile is a smile. All around the world,
a frown is a frown. All around the world, human beings will
act protective and caring when it comes to the people they
are close to or love or admire or respect. - In a social situation,
that would translate to telling a dear person, /first/, who
someone else is. Naturally, others present can read the clues.
Now, some Important People, narcissists, hate to think that
/they/ are not /first/ in the minds and hearts of everyone
around them and might punish anyone who shows "disrespect".
So that's a pragmatic reason to introduce others "to them".
Pragmatically, in the same direction, the Important Person
is apt to be known without introduction ... which seems to be
added for completeness or symmetry.
"King, this is my wife, Betsy. Betsy, (of course) this is the King."
Maybe you could be forgiven for reversing the order when
introducing a small, confused child to the King. The small child
might feel slightly ignored if it went the other way. (If you
believe children have feelings.)
Post by Tony Cooper
The only time I've been in formal business situations where there was
a definite sense of the need to observe this type of social convention
was when I was dealing with Germans at Carl Zeiss, Inc. As a
distributor for Zeiss products, I spent quite a bit of time in Zeiss's
US headquarters and I also visited several Zeiss facilities in
Germany. My impression was that the Germans were much more formal
One American that was with the same group I was with in Oberkochen
addressed a high-ranking Zeiss executive as "Dieter" instead of "Dr
(name)" and the wincing of the other Germans in the group was